You rise up and go into the room and feel it. That momentary pause. That glance. Sometimes curious, other times condescending. You’re not fabricating it; the act of sitting as the lone woman at the table feels no different from being centre stage with no audition. The chair is yours, but nevertheless, you still have to prove yourself to be worth sitting there. This is a common experience for women in the boardroom.
You don’t need to ask permission to lead. But being one of one, you can end up shrinking inevitably, to keep your safety intact, by tiredness just from being a perpetual presence.
You don’t have to do it their way. You get to lead your own way. Loud or soft, bold or reflective, direct or subtle. There’s no one-size-fits-all, and that’s your strength.
But Visibility Isn’t Volume
Being recognized in a room comes from the consistency and quality of what you bring. When your words offer clarity, direction, or thoughtful perspective, people begin to pay attention. Over time, your voice becomes a steady point others rely on, not because of volume, but because of substance.
It can feel intense when the environment around you moves with a certain rhythm or tone. Still, your own approach holds value as it is. Relying on it with confidence often leads to the most genuine impact.
The Silence Between the Words
You may find that you pause more before speaking. That’s not hesitation. It means you’re not filling space just to sound confident. You’re listening. You’re choosing your words. You’re anchoring yourself before responding.
Sometimes leadership, especially for women in the boardroom, shows itself not in the speed of a reply, but in the strength behind it. And here’s something to remember: when you don’t rush to speak, people tend to lean in a little closer.
Don’t Shrink to Fit, Expand the Frame
You’re there because you bring something the room needs, whether they realise it yet or not, and remember, you don’t have to blend in like the rest.
If the conversations circle around the same perspectives, speak from your own. That fresh lens? That’s the value. Not everyone will welcome it at first, but the most effective leaders don’t shape themselves to match the group. They expand what the group can hold.
You’ve already earned your seat. Now use it.
Emotional Labor Isn’t a Leadership Requirement
You’re not the office therapist. You’re not the unofficial secretary or the one expected to “soften” the messaging. If you find yourself automatically taking on invisible tasks, such as note-taking, conflict smoothing, and follow-up reminders, pause. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
Boundaries don’t make you difficult; they make you sustainable. For women in the Boardroom, establishing clear boundaries is crucial for maintaining focus and protecting valuable time. And if someone flinches at you protecting your time or focus, that says more about their expectations than your approach.
Celebrate Clarity
When you speak, be clear. Don’t shrink your suggestions into questions. Don’t over-explain. Don’t wrap your point in layers of “maybe.”
Try this: Say what you mean. Stop there.
Clarity is compelling. It doesn’t need volume, flair, or endless framing. It stands on its own. If you’ve been taught that directness is too much, you might hesitate at first. That’s okay. Confidence builds with use.
Take Up the Space You Need
Some days, the smallest choices reinforce your leadership. This is especially true for women in the boardroom, where subtle actions can speak volumes. It’s about not sitting at the edge of the table, like sharing your idea even if someone has already passed it over. Like staying in your body when someone interrupts, not laughing it off, not folding in, but gently cutting back in.
Leadership often shows up in the smaller moments, the ones where you choose to stay present, speak up, or hold your ground when it would feel simpler to step back.
Find Allies Without Explaining Yourself
Not everyone needs to be convinced. Look for the ones who see your work and respect it. Allies often come in quiet forms: an advocate in another department, a colleague who brings attention back when you’re talked over, a peer who shares the credit.
Don’t carry the burden alone. You can choose who gets to walk beside you. Building support is mostly about honesty and alignment. And no, you don’t have to explain why it matters.
Guard That Which Clears You
The rowdiness comes fast with leadership. Meetings. Deadlines. Pressures mounting. The still spots where you stay grounded get lost easily. This challenge is particularly relevant for women in the boardroom, who often navigate unique demands.
It doesn’t have to be a full hour or a trip to a retreat by plane. It could be five minutes right before your first call. A lunch with no screen. A window on your calendar that you protect as if it were included in your paycheck.
You cannot lead effectively with a distracted mind. Treat yourself to structure that anchors you. Even those practical choices like adopting regular systems or contracting operational work support your clarity. Offices do it as well. Quite often, they subcontract core needs like commercial janitorial services so that leadership energy stays where it counts.
Little things matter when it’s your presence that’s being judged by everyone.
Redefine Power as We Know It
Power doesn’t necessarily mean dominating a room. Sometimes it means being the one who hears differently. Sometimes it means holding silence after having said something. Sometimes it means choosing to miss a meeting that you don’t have to attend, and sending a substitute to speak up for you.
You have the freedom to lead in a way that reflects your values, your mindset, and the way you move through the world. By doing that, you naturally open the door for others to lead with the same kind of honesty and alignment.
Continue to Show Up Without Folding In
You may still feel the gaze. The interruption. The eye rolling. And you may still feel the desire to shrink yourself to fit into a sense of harmony. Women in the boardroom often face these unspoken pressures.
You don’t have to wrestle all the time. But neither do you have to yield to it. Keep being present, not to provide evidence to something, but to provide something worth holding onto with your leadership. Your thoughts, your being, and your way matter even if the room doesn’t slowly come to appreciate that back.
One day, another person will come into that conference room and be just a little less fearful because you did not scream.
